1. I try to keep it PG around here, but sometimes things are too funny to ignore, even if they aren't exactly child-friendly. To that end, I bring you F### You, Penguin, a site with a LOT of swearing...and cute pictures of animals. The language is not appropriate for children, but hey, welcome to the internet! Here's a sample of the site, with the swearing hashed out (this follows a cute picture of an elephant poking its trunk at the camera):
2. After spending some time with my niece, who is eight, I have learned that children do not make distinctions between good pop culture and bad pop culture. Like, Disney's Beauty and the Beast and Enchanted are just the same to her as Drake and Josh. To adults, these are not the same. NOT AT ALL.
What's that, Elephant? You have a large trunk? I had no idea, because it's not like you are putting it DIRECTLY IN FRONT OF MY F###ING FACE. You know, I'm pretty tall, too. I can reach the top shelf in my kitchen. I also spray water out of my nose to bathe myself practically every day. So please, stop pretending that just because you can do math and recognize your buddies you should get a f###ing Presidential Medal of Honor. Hey, there's Jim, with four other friends whom I recognize, which makes five people total. NOT THAT HARD ELEPHANT, STEP YOUR GAME UP.
3. My niece just wrote her first story (I was doing revisions on The Book and she was inspired). It was pretty awesome, actually.* It's called "The Ghost." It's no E.T., by Sarah Ockler, but it is an original story, so there's that.**
* It did have the patented "It Was All A Dream" ending, but I figure eight is a little young to be criticized for cliches. Nothing is a cliche when you're an eight-year-old writer.
** Sarah has found a copy of the first story she remembers, which was a retelling of E.T. It's awesome, and you should totally read it. It's E.T. like you've never seen it before. :) Seriously. It's illustrated, too!