How Do I Know What I Think Until I See What I Say?

1. This weekend, I went to see Burlesque with Cher and Christina Aguilera. It was AWESOME. Don't get me wrong, it wasn't a good movie, but it was hilarious, and campy, and had snappy dialogue, and Cher sang twice and Christina sang about a hundred times and the amazing thing that saved the tiny burlesque club from destruction is totally not the amazing thing you think it's going to be, and yeah...AWESOME. If you like Cher and/or Christina Aguilera, you should totally go see it. 2. When I am 69 years old, I want to look like Cher. In fact, I'm willing to look like Cher now. 3. Lately, I've been watching Law & Order UK , and it's fascinating to see the familiar cases from the original Law & Order remade from an English point of view.* The English legal system fascinates me, and the stories are just as good as ever. The original was on television for 20 years for a reason. ~~~ * And the barristers wear wigs! Really ill-fitting old fashioned ones ...

Recently, I've been seeing a lot of commercials that, superficially, seem to say one thing* but also saying another much less flattering thing. This cracks me up, because it seems like, if I'm seeing these things, shouldn't the people who get paid a lot of money to create the commercials see them, too? But let me give some examples, so you can see what I'm talking about: 1. The Swiffer Commercials Look, I love Swiffer. I use Swiffer (the plain ordinary wipe-on-a-stick ones, not the crazy jet ones). But this series of commercials is way screwed up. Take a look: There's a whole series of these, in which the broom or mop essentially stalks the woman (never a man, notice) who has switched to Swiffer. On the surface, oh, ha ha, the broom and mop are sad that you left them. What a cute-ish commercial! But even if we set aside the fact that the commercial is essentially making light of stalking behaviors (since stalking by a broom is, you know, not very likely), th...

Lately, I've been reading a lot of series YA books,* books that have two or three or four sequels, and I have to say that it hasn't been going so well. Usually, this is what happens: (1) I love the first book. It's awesome and original and the characters are great. (2) The second book is good. Maybe the idea isn't as good, or the characters seem a little stale or something. But it's still a pretty good book, and I'm looking forward to the next one. (3) I read book three and think "really"? and put it down halfway through after skimming to the end to find out who dies. For a while I wasn't sure why I was having that reaction. I mean, these are all different authors, writing about very different topics, so how was it possible that my reaction was pretty much the same each time? Was it ME? Could I be the problem?** Then I realized what was happening--it was the adults. I went back to confirm and, sure enough, in each of these different serie...

Lately, I've been seeing a lot of blog posts about writing contracts and clauses. As a lawyer, the contracts part of the publishing business is one of the interesting parts of the business for me, and since I don't do publishing contracts myself, I thought I would gather up all the posts into one giant linkfest. Enjoy!* 1. Here's Jane at Dystel and Goderich Literary Agency on the importance of reading your contract, a post that was inspired by a publisher sending out a notice of amendment for their contracts. 2. Here's a post over at Bookends LLC by writer Sally MacKenzie, about how she realized there's no such thing as a "boilerplate" contract.** 3. Here's Agent Kristin at Pub Rants talking about why you might not want a multi-book deal. (Hint: it involves the term "cross-collateralization." 4. And here's Agent Kristin again, on how one unethical person can ruin things for the rest of us. (Long story short: an agent tampered ...

I used to be awesome at titles. For real. My fan fiction has awesome titles, catchy and intriguing and epic in scope. That has changed recently. I don't know what's up with me, but right now my titles are boring and descriptive. Agent Ted and I are agonizing* over what to call The Book. And my Next Book is titled something so boring I can't even bring myself to type it here for fear that you might fall asleep just reading it. And there are so many good titles on the market, recently.** The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo, The Dead and the Gone, The Forest of Hands and Teeth, Winter Girls, Don't Judge A Girl By Her Cover, Shiver, ...I could go on and on and on. We're having a real title renaissance at the moment, I think, and, as a result, I'm having a bit of title jealousy. Jane, over at Dystel and Goderich, had a recent post about titles, and so did Eric over at Pimp My Novel . Neither of these posts have fixed my title malaise (yet!), but they're a goo...

I'm in the middle of revision. Again. I'm always in the middle of revision, if you want the honest truth: as a fast writer, someone who screams through a first draft and puts stuff like [INSERT DRAMATIC SCENE HERE] in my drafts, the moment I put something down on (figurative) paper, I'm already revising. Really, my writing is, like, 80% revision, and I have no fear of it. But sometimes, I get tired. We all do. As I talked about here, it's really important that the author isn't the one to give up on a book before anyone else does, but that's sometimes hard to remember the fifth (or eighth, or tenth) time through a manuscript. And, on top of being tired, there are the doubts. Because the fifth (or twelfth, or fourteenth) time through the book, there are moments when I look at the book and I think "jesus, this isn't very good." Unlike weariness with a project--which can be fought through--there's nothing to really do about the doubts. I can...

1. Elmo got a ticket this weekend. 87 in a 70.* But it's not my fault that Elmo doesn't really settle in until 75. I have a need for speed!** 2. I have been seeing a lot of baseball lately. A lot . And today was a very exciting game -- Brewers v. Pirates, which the Brewers won with a walkoff homer by Corey Hart. Not this Corey Hart: This Corey Hart: The thing that cracks me up is that Corey Hart, the baseball player, was born in 1982, which is a mere TWO YEARS before Corey Hart, the musician, became famous for "Never Surrender" and "Sunglasses at Night." Sometimes, the world works in mysterious ways. 3. I love high summer. The only thing bad about summer is that it's followed by fall. Stupid fall. 4. I'm visiting with my niece this week. It's only the second day, and I have already seen enough Hannah Montana to last me a lifetime. ::shiver:: ~~~ * Actual exchange between me and the polite officer who stopped me: Him: Do you know...